Est. 2024
Where the truth wears a tutu and the facts fandango. We are the Damned unreliable News!
World Headlines
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Smoke on the Horizon: Vatican Goes Full Lockdown After Pope Francis’ Exit at 88
READ MORE →: Smoke on the Horizon: Vatican Goes Full Lockdown After Pope Francis’ Exit at 88The Pope is dead, the throne is empty, and 135 crimson-cloaked men are locked in a…
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Lunar strip show? Not quite
READ MORE →: Lunar strip show? Not quiteLUNAR ORBIT — Internet Perverts Turn to Astronomy in Hopes of Unfiltered, Unedited Glimpse of the…
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Moochers Force Handyman’s Great Escape
READ MORE →: Moochers Force Handyman’s Great EscapeTOLEDO OH. & URUGUAY – Handyman changes identity, starts new life in foreign country to avoid…
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World Shocked to See That Cuba’s Electrical Infrastructure from the 1950s Is Not Robust or Reliable
READ MORE →: World Shocked to See That Cuba’s Electrical Infrastructure from the 1950s Is Not Robust or ReliableHAVANA – CUBA In a revelation that has left energy experts across the globe dumbfounded, reports…
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To Improve Morale at Sweatshops, Apple Throws Employees a Pizza Party
READ MORE →: To Improve Morale at Sweatshops, Apple Throws Employees a Pizza PartyIn an unprecedented move to boost morale among its overseas workforce, Apple has announced plans to…
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Iranians Consider Taking a Break from Camel Fucking to Invade Israel
READ MORE →: Iranians Consider Taking a Break from Camel Fucking to Invade IsraelIn a shocking yet somehow predictable turn of events, Iranians are considering pausing their national pastime…
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To Contain The Spread Of Monkey Pox, WHO Advises Avoiding Contact with Mammals That Have Oozing Blisters and Sores
READ MORE →: To Contain The Spread Of Monkey Pox, WHO Advises Avoiding Contact with Mammals That Have Oozing Blisters and SoresWHO’s Grossly Obvious Warning GENEVA, SWITZERLAND – In a groundbreaking announcement that has left the world…
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People Becoming Dumber After Using New Canadian Artificial Intelligence Tool, Dubbed Eh-I
READ MORE →: People Becoming Dumber After Using New Canadian Artificial Intelligence Tool, Dubbed Eh-ITORONTO, CANADA – A groundbreaking new artificial intelligence tool developed by Canadian researchers is causing widespread…
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American Tourists Shocked to Discover That Scuba Tours Ran Out of Dilapidated Shack in Mexico Are Unsafe
READ MORE →: American Tourists Shocked to Discover That Scuba Tours Ran Out of Dilapidated Shack in Mexico Are UnsafeCancún, Mexico – In a shocking turn of events that has left the entire nation of…
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Satan Prepares for Boomer Invasion: Hell’s Gate Gets an Upgrade
READ MORE →: Satan Prepares for Boomer Invasion: Hell’s Gate Gets an UpgradeHELL – In an unprecedented move that has sent shockwaves through the underworld, Satan has announced…
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Snoop Dogg Ignites Controversy, Not the Olympic Flame
READ MORE →: Snoop Dogg Ignites Controversy, Not the Olympic FlameParis, France – In a move that has left the world scratching its head and the…
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Tech Billionaire Throws Tantrum, Grounds Entire Airline Industry Until Flights to Epstein Island Resume
READ MORE →: Tech Billionaire Throws Tantrum, Grounds Entire Airline Industry Until Flights to Epstein Island Resume2 SEATTLE, WA – In a move that surprised absolutely no one, tech billionaire Bill Gates…