PAYSON, UT – In a bizarre incident that has left local authorities baffled and conspiracy theorists ecstatic, thousands of vehicles on Interstate 15 were mysteriously transported back to November 5, 1955. Experts believe the sudden and inexplicable time displacement occurred when the average freeway speed reached a precise 88.8 miles per hour, a number which everyone knows is where a vehicle achieves temporal displacement.
Eyewitnesses reported seeing a blinding flash of light followed by a disorienting sensation before finding themselves in a world devoid of smartphones, seatbelts, and any form of electronic device. Being Utah, many drivers were initially convinced they had died and gone to the planet Kolob, only to be quickly disillusioned by the lack of cloud-like structures and the abundance of poodle skirts.
“I was just trying to get to work on time,” said bewildered commuter, Gary Peterson, now sporting a questionable pompadour and a pair of pegged pants. “One minute I’m flying along in traffic, the next thing I know, I’m dodging trolley cars and trying to figure out how to work a rotary phone.”
While the sudden influx of modern vehicles has caused a minor stir in the past, local authorities are more concerned with the potential for historical paradoxes. Experts warn that any attempt to alter the course of history could have catastrophic consequences for the future.
“We’re asking anyone who has traveled back in time to refrain from winning the lottery, preventing the assassination of JFK, or inventing any groundbreaking technology,” said a spokesperson for the Utah Department of Public Safety. “Just try to blend in and avoid drawing too much attention to yourself.”
As for how to get everyone back to the future, scientists are currently exploring various theories, including building a plutonium powered commuter train. Until then, Utah residents are advised to stock up on vinyl records, set their cruise control at no more than 85, and be prepared for a world without TikTok.
Utah Freeway Turns into DeLorean Future Shocked Utah Freeway Turns into DeLorean Future Shocked
