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Garbage Pail Kids’ eerie foresight
Common toys of childhood psychopaths found to hold mystic powers.
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Dysentery deserves better resolution
Dysentery makes a comeback, as Gen X activists cry for an ultra-high def gaming classic, “The Oregon Trail”.
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Thomas Edison’s Midnight Legacy
MENLO PARK, NJ – Asshole Thomas Edison blamed for fucking up human sleep patterns since 1879. In a…
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Boomers Prove How Active and Spry They Still Are by Rushing to the Front of Every Line Before Becoming Confused and Holding Everyone Else Up
In a stunning display of vitality and agility, Baby Boomers across the nation are proving that they’ve still…
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Creative Geniuses at Disney Are Finding New Ways to Milk Robert Downey Jr for All He’s Worth
Burbank, CA – In a groundbreaking move that has shocked both industry analysts and casual moviegoers alike, Disney…