Bowling with trolls—balls never stuck!
RENO, NV – In a move that has shocked and bemused the local community, Lucky Strike Bowling Alley has announced the hiring of a real-life troll to handle the persistent problem of stuck bowling balls. The troll, named Grog, comes with a resume that includes bridge guarding and scaring goats, making him uniquely qualified for the task.
The decision to employ Grog was made after numerous complaints from frustrated bowlers who had grown tired of waiting for human staff to retrieve their wayward balls. “We needed someone who could get in there quickly and efficiently,” said manager Larry Johnson. “And who better than a troll with a knack for tight spaces and a fearless attitude?”
Upon his debut, Grog lumbered down to Lane 7, where a ball had been stuck for the better part of an hour. Ignoring the usual protocol of turning off the pinsetter, Grog simply reached in with his massive, gnarled hand and yanked the ball out with a grunt. Onlookers cheered, while small children hid behind their parents.
“I was skeptical at first, but Grog really gets the job done,” said local bowler Karen Smith. “Although, I could do without the growling and the occasional club-waving.”
Not everyone is thrilled with the new hire. The local workers’ union has expressed concern over Grog’s lack of formal training and his potential to unionize the mythical creatures of the area. “We need to ensure that all employees, regardless of species, are given proper safety training,” said union representative Ted Hamilton. “And maybe some breath mints. Troll breath is no joke.”
Grog, who is paid in a mix of cash and leftover nachos, seems to be enjoying his new role. “Grog like balls,” he said in a rare interview. “Grog smash balls. But gently, so no one mad.”
Bowling Alley staff are already seeing the benefits of their unconventional employee. “Since Grog started, we’ve had fewer complaints and more amused customers,” noted Johnson. “We’re even considering hiring a fairy to keep the lanes polished.”
However, there have been a few hiccups. One unfortunate incident involved Grog mistaking a particularly shiny bowling ball for a goblin egg. It took a solid half hour and a free game voucher to convince him to return it. There’s also the issue of Grog’s tendency to gnaw on the lane bumpers during his breaks.
Despite these minor setbacks, the community is adjusting to their new, hulking helper. “It’s a little weird, sure,” admitted bowler Mike Davis. “But if it means I don’t have to wait an eternity to get my ball back, I’m all for it. Plus, it’s not every day you get to bowl with a troll.”
As Grog continues to adapt to his new environment, Lucky Strike Bowling Alley remains optimistic about their innovative hire. “Who knows?” mused Johnson. “If this works out, maybe we’ll branch out. I hear dragons make excellent lane cleaners.”
In the meantime, Grog’s presence is already becoming a local legend. “Come for the bowling, stay for the troll,” reads the new tagline on Lucky Strike’s promotional materials. And with Grog on the job, one thing’s for certain: stuck balls are a thing of the past.
Bowling with trolls—balls never stuck!
