Est. 2024

Where the truth wears a tutu and the facts fandango. We are the Damned unreliable News!

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Dial-Up Modem Tones Have Been Linked to Secret US Government Program, MK Ultra, Phase II

April 18, 2026

Dial-up modem tones were secretly part of MK Ultra MKII — the CIA’s audio mind-control program that turned an entire generation into dopamine-addicted scroll zombies who still flinch at that demonic screech. They didn’t need drugs. They just needed us to connect.
READ MORE →: Dial-Up Modem Tones Have Been Linked to Secret US Government Program, MK Ultra, Phase II
Irish Man Found Sober, Local Scholars and Doctors Baffled

April 18, 2026

In a medical miracle that has stunned Ireland, 47-year-old Patrick O’Malley was found completely sober in a Dublin pub at 11:47 a.m. on a Tuesday. Local doctors are baffled, priests are being called, and the entire bar is in mourning.
READ MORE →: Irish Man Found Sober, Local Scholars and Doctors Baffled
Desperate, Lonely Morons Now Paying $1.99 a Minute for AI Jesus to Stroke Their Ego and Confirm They’re Going to Heaven

April 13, 2026

Pathetic humans are now paying $1.99 a minute for AI Jesus to validate their bullshit and promise them Heaven. Real Jesus demanded sacrifice. This one just wants your credit card and three minutes of your fragile ego.
READ MORE →: Desperate, Lonely Morons Now Paying $1.99 a Minute for AI Jesus to Stroke Their Ego and Confirm They’re Going to Heaven

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