NEPHI, UT. – In a shocking display of inhumanity that has sent shockwaves through the nation, local woman, Gigi Fonzerelli, has categorically refused to prepare a sandwich for her ex-husband, Tony, igniting a fierce debate on the fundamental rights of divorced men.
Gigi, a seemingly ordinary suburbanite, has been accused of committing a heinous act of domestic terrorism by denying her former spouse a simple, carbohydrate-based meal. Eyewitnesses report that Gigi’s refusal was delivered with a chilling, almost clinical detachment, as if she were rejecting a telemarketer’s offer.
“I was simply asking for a sandwich,” Tony, visibly shaken, told reporters. “Nothing fancy. Just bread, meat, and cheese. Is that too much to ask? I mean, we were married for 20 years. She knows how I like my sandwiches. I didn’t think that asking her for one more, you know, for old times sake, was that big of a deal”.
Social media has erupted with heated discussions, with some arguing that Gigi’s actions constitute a form of emotional abuse, while more woke keyboard warriors maintain that she is well within her rights to deny her ex-husband any form of sustenance. Experts have weighed in, suggesting that this incident could be a symptom of a larger societal breakdown, and a key indicator as to why half of marriages end in divorce.
“This is a clear case of sandwichgate,” said Dr. Evelyn Carter, a leading relationship therapist. “It’s a microcosm of the power dynamics that often arise after a divorce. Dr Carter went on to say “what kind of a monster won’t make someone a sandwich, even if that someone is her ex? Life doesn’t have to be this hard ladies, make the guy a goddamned sandwich!”
As the outrage continues to grow, one can’t help but wonder: Where does it end? Will we soon see ex-spouses refusing to lend each other lawnmowers or answer simple questions about the Wi-Fi password? The implications are staggering.
Ex-Wife Sandwich Snub Ex-Wife Sandwich Snub